Season 16, great.

It’s been a while.

 

I have been quietly ignoring the TF2 scene because of its stench and all the stale teams that persist. It is the end of yet another season and has anything changed?

No.

It’s been your typical unexciting season. Let’s have a look:

 Image

 

Epsilon still waltzed through untouched even though they rarely practice, showing the extremely high standards that our professional e-sport maintains. All we see is one “average” leveled team destroying a low standard mix of shitters.

I say “decent” because if you were to compare epsilon to any real e-sport team then they would not be considered good. And these low standard shitters or “PREM” players are on par with div 1 and even div 2 players (screenshots can confirm this). Let’s see who will fold and reform with the same recycled players [hint HYS, Byte].

 

Let’s look at some players that the whole scene can laugh at:

Walker

Droso

HYS

Huhy

Sideshow

Shifty

These are players who have very poor aim and no brain, yet they still remain in PREM and will constantly be recycled. You could probably pick div 5 players at random and find more talent there.

 

The best thing for the scene would be for Epsilon to fold. True, the standard of TF2 would drop, but at least there would be a hint of excitement at seeing which shitter manages to climb to the top.

What will you do? Will you continue to feign interest in Admirable’s generic and completely inoffensive pre-season line-ups?

 I can already predict it:

“This is –insert team name here-. It looks like quite a strong line-up with some good players! –insert player name- has very good dm, and the scout combo work very well together. They DEFINITELY won’t fold then reform eh!”

PREM and DIV 2A

Hello fellow TF2 players.

I have been rather inactive recently because I have found most things unworthy to talk about at the moment. However I noticed that the fans wanted, and so I will provide. I will skim over a few things and provide my insight.

DOCTRINAL Changes.
So this is the most shuffled roster in PREM, containing only two original players ilike2spin and snyyppis. They were in need of a demo and thankfully HYS and BYTE was not picked. I thought the decision was wise to pick up erectus on demo. However, as many of you will know from reading my first blog, Harbleu is quite awful – yet he was picked up. Strange move? I think so. Yet another bizarre decision was to have retsh0ck on scout and even SEPTIQUE! Well, we can see how well it is going. BLBALBALBLALBA

PYROGEN Disappointment.
After spreading my influence and helping the underdogs overcome an unruly situation by achieving a playoff, they have disappointed me and many by dropping. They had an unfortunate start by getting smashed by Broder, which was expected. However, they were decimated by some of the weakest teams including Quarantine (this roster laughably includes Lime and Fuo). It is understandable to lose the first few games after jumping from div 2 to PREM, they should have just stuck it out together. If anything, they at least lasted longer than the potentials would have.

CASI ANGELES TROLL TEAM?
Well, I thought I would break away from PREM (I know how you all love PREM because it is full of amazing talented people) to talk about a team in my division. It was an awful jewish team and they are obviously going to fold after not even turning up for their official. One of their players cheekily created this thread: http://etf2l.org/forum/general/topic-24054/

heheheheh
WRECKED SHITTER?

BRODER FAILED AGAINST EPSILON
We are all disappointed by broder’s failure to topple Epsilon. Maybe broder would be better if Darn was on soldier? LOL

HYS Strikes Again

Good evening.

After the recent drama with HYS you think he would have learned his lesson. However, this is not the case. Once again he has been slivering about with his snake tongue, trying to manipulate and control people.

dirty snake

As we know from my previous blog post, MyDGB have been in trouble. They are currently trying to repair their roster, lacking 3 players in total. HYS was involved as a potential demo and said that if Cyber and Evilmoon could also join then that would sort out all the problems. Of course it wasn’t this simple, he had to complicate it and spread his stench all over. While he was doing this, he was also trying to wiggle his way back into Doctrinal. Even worse (and I don’t even understand why he thought this was a good idea), he tried to poach Kiler4fun from MyDGB to form his own team. Obviously, Kiler4fun refused and when the others found out, HYS was rejected. Now HYS seems to have only one way left to enter PREM: Doctrinal. What will happen? Will Doctrinal accept him because they are desperately in need for a demo? Or will they refuse because of his past offences?

STAY TUNED.

PREM Changes, roster shuffles

I said before that Best Friends Forever had some changes incoming. Darn has been kicked from BFF because of the skill gap in the team, and at last replaced by a much superior soldier by the name of Daleth. Evilmoon has also been replaced by Hat. Now we have yet another decent team to rival Broder and Epsilon. However, what is happening with Doctrinal and MyDGB?

Doctrinal have lost Stark due to boredom of playing scout and therefore lost Greg as well. The ties between HYS and Doctrinal have been severed because of his ego issues so I highly doubt he will be the new demo. Instead, it looks like Byte might make the step up. With Spin on the med, THE POTENTIAL (lol) soldiers could be Darn and Synppis/Captain Hax. On scouts, I have heard rumours of a deadly scout combo: Gubbins and even possibly DROSOPHILE.

MyDGB may kick t0da because of his poor performance and Si because of the lag. There is also an issue with the scouts, my guess is that one of them may have to go. They did lose to a division 3 team that had mercs so I can see why they want to shuffle the roster.
hehe
I think Evilmoon will be the new medic and PREM DEMO HYS might join because of his need for PREM.

Admins???

Looks like I was right again. Not only were Pyrogen the best (not Avenue or The Potentials as the Admins thought), but The Potentials have proven to be highly unstable and have just folded, just as I had warned the admins before. Maybe they should listen to the community more as that’s 3 seasons in a row they’ve put an unstable team in prem.

??

BYTE

Byte:

Looking forward coming back with a team, the making of this team is based off the word “keen” the members currently in my lineup are all super keen, which is what I need. More importantly I hope to bring some of these youngsters (yes I’m old) into the prem gap and hopefully they get accepted at the top level, as we do need to bring in new legitimate players to prem. As for achieving something? Depending on if we are put in div 1 or prem next season in ETF2L, we would be aiming to maintain our position in prem if we got in, as for div 1, our aim would be to win it for sure.

A lot of scepticism I’m sure people will be thinking into the players I have chosen, but I believe with my help/knowledge their dedication/effort they can be a force to be reckoned with!

“Depending on if we are put in div 1 or prem next season in ETF2L, we would be aiming to maintain our position in prem if we got in, as for div 1, our aim would be to win it for sure.”

hahahha

Chin Up HYS, PREM Another Day

Had I not changed the ETF2L admin team’s decision, it would have only been Avenue and The Potentials in the playoffs. Thankfully Pyrogen and (maybe not thankfully) tf.logs were added as well to avoid any further controversy. As expected, Avenue and The Potentials weren’t the best choices for the playoffs as the admins thought: Pyrogen were the winners.

Now we see a spectacular and thrilling game coming up tonight. The Potentials against logs.tf. Now both teams are in an unfortunate situation, where from playing for a chance in PREM, they are now playing to stay out of division 2. Someone in logs.tf (probably Hildreth) thought it would be appropriate to apply for PREM even though it was blindingly obvious they would lose. Why did they do this if they had a firm position in division 1? Half of their team didn’t want to be signed up for the playoffs because they realised that they would be more likely to lose both games and thus be placed back in division 2. Well done Hildreth.

And now onto The Potentials newest member, HYS. Many of you will know that HYS formed The Last Resort. They managed to do exceedingly well, and achieved a mid table finish in season 13 with one of the worst lineups that PREM has ever seen:

LOL

This caused an inflation in his ego, which was already at quite an abnormal size. He was trialing with an established PREM team, Doctrinal who are one of the few teams that remain humble in that division. HYS seemed to be pleased, getting some good results against PREM teams (results is all that matters after all). However, because of the inflated ego as mentioned previously, he felt the need to criticise almost every player on the team and explain why they were less skillful than himself. It seemed all well and Doctrinal were ready to accept him (mainly due to lack of choice, HYS being the only one available at that moment). However…..Pirate Radio publicly announced how HYS tried to poach Greg and Beavern from other teams to reform TLR. Greg said he would like to move away from that topic as to not ruin his potential teammate’s reputation. Kaidus said: “Ruining? More like reinforcing the rep he already has”. This was a fair statement and nothing more was thought of it. However, deep down inside HYS, anger was brewing. He could not handle this light hearted joke (due to the inflated ego) so decided to join Byte’s team because they would get better results. I don’t know where he got this idea from, the results from Doctrinal were already good. So let’s summarise:

HYS was offered a chance in PREM with a good stable team.
He refused because he couldn’t take a joke and was chasing unrealistic results.
He joined The Potentials and lost the playoffs.
He is now playing to stay out of division 2.

Well done HYS, your idiocy knows no boundaries. No doubt you can just leave The Potentials and reform TLR: I hear BFF have some changes incoming.

Well done ETF2L

The European Team Fortress 2 League was once again about to make a brash decision. It was leaked that the two teams in the playoffs would be Avenue and The Potentials. After this leak (from more than one source), the admins typically tried to cover themselves and claimed they had no idea what I was talking about on my previous blog which exposed them.

admin lies

One day before the provisionals, Emb lies that he has no idea of any playoffs. On the same day, his fellow admin Sonny Black says that there will probably be playoffs and extends another lie, saying they had not selected the teams yet. If you are going to lie, don’t make it so blatant by contradicting each other! At least collaborate with your fellow admins. Did you expect the community to believe you hadn’t made any plans one day before the provisionals?

Despite all this, I noticed the ETF2L thread for my blog gathering quite a few views and supportive comments (thank you for this), and the admins could no longer ignore this.

cheeky!

This cheeky little thread then appeared afterwards (keep in mind, only ONE day before provisionals!), posted by a trial admin, which the head admins seemed to be keeping an eye on. As a result, two teams, pyrogen and logs.tf, were added to the provisional playoffs along with the ALREADY decided Avenue and Potentials. I still find The Potentials and Avenue a strange decision: Avenue do not have scouts or a demo at the moment and these logs show some very disturbing statistics for The Potentials.
ouch decimated [nice damage output cookye, gape]

The Potentials are also somewhat lacking with their roster since Ally the medic was kicked today and they still don’t have a confirmed 2nd soldier (Although this is not as bad as Avenue, this is still only two thirds of a roster). Will Byte find two players in time before the playoffs? Myself and HYS were asked if we were interested in playing, so Byte seems to be considering a change to medic. I decided to join r7an’s div 2 team; what will HYS do? It’s slightly strange that a new team has been given a PREM playoff without a full lineup. Pyrogen on the other hand seem to be doing quite well together:

gg

It is also strange that Elemental Violence, after a commendable season in div 1 were not approached. They have also been playing well recently and are a very stable team. There are blatantly other teams too, which would have been more appropriate, i.e. teams who play well and have full stable line ups.

From the looks of it, the admins made a slightly rational decision and picked at least a couple of teams which deserve a chance. Even though they will NEVER admit that they lied and leaked or that my blog influenced their decisions, I thought I would be gracious and say well done ETF2L!

It has now become apparent to me, that ETF2L needs a symbol, a hero for the people if you will, to speak out for the community against the suppressive and secretive nature of the admin team. I am willing to take this burden upon myself.

hero

A few points…

Good evening.

PREM Playoffs.

We have seen a somewhat uninteresting set of PREM teams [consisting mainly of recycled PREM players], but there is one that catches my eye: The Potentials. This is a new lineup of players that are in the playoffs for a spot in the PREMier division. Many may think it’s a bizzare combination of players and I would not argue. The most worrying thing is that team’s who have played together for a long time, and worked to get to a respectable position in division 1, aren’t in the playoffs. Were these teams Lutuset and uV even offered a chance in the playoffs? More to the point, some of the players in The Potentials have been highly unstable in previous teams, Gubbins even folding two PREMier teams in past seasons. I feel that it’s byte’s position and power within ETF2L and the community that has achieved their position rather than results. Perhaps ETF2L should have stricter policies for teams that consistantly fold and reform, so that established teams can climb the ranks (Punchline, Doctrinal).

Recruitment Posts.

I won’t go into too much detail about this. But since when was being humble a bad thing? Accept your own standards and play with a similarly skilled team and enjoy yourself. Losing 3 games in div 2, folding, then sticking up div 1 recruitment posts just shows that you are arrogant and probably awful at the game. You know who you are:

recruitment

I question mark’d the American, as that’s even funnier. It’s typical American arrogance, just because you are from America, does not mean that you are good!

Ipz and ETF2L Drama.

Ipz was banned from his job as PR manager in ETF2L for telling someone to “go die” and after getting banned he released rumours about Nike wanting to sponsor TF2. He gave the impression that since he was banned, the sponsorship would not go through without him.
My thoughts on this:
Nike won’t sponsor TF2 because the ETF2L community are more likely to buy fleshlights than sports equipment, so he’s talking shit.
Ipz told someone on the forum that they should die so was banned. He should maybe GROW UP.

Prem Hero?

With the aftermath of EU getting destroyed by NA at I Series in the summer, ETF2L has decided to allow specific unlocks.  One of which is the gunboats which allows soldiers to rocket jump everywhere with reduced self damage.  This change made me (and probably other players) want to switch to soldier.  Now I ain’t very good at soldier, not even counting with gunboats, so I decided to learn how to use the recently allowed item correctly so I could become a decent roamer.  So while browsing ETF2L.org innocently, I noticed a thread titled “Any experiences or tips about GUNBOATS?”.  I thought that was very convenient! I clicked on it. The first thing I saw was a youtube link so I opened it.

It was this video:

Maybe I would see how an INVITE, basically PREM (or w/e it is called) soldier plays and learn by his example.  It’s a player from the USA who has been using gunboats for a long time.    I could only watch the first ten minutes because it was pretty awful.  Bearing in mind this is a VanillaTV insight video which is for scrubs to learn from.

00:40: Harbleu jumps in hits a few splash rockets and dies.
01:20: “Don’t die harb” he ignores, goes in and dies.
02:40: Misses quite a few rockets lol. dies.
03:20: Basically misses everything at mid fight
06:10 With his fellow soldier, can’t kill a scout who walks round a corner. Scout kills a soldier before he dies.
06:30 Bombs med hits one rocket. Dies.
08:00 Tries to hide on mid while a soldier is watching, maybe hits two rockets in the whole of the mid fight, dies.
08:40 Probably the best (well, worst) clip.  I don’t even know wtf is going on there, seems to just walk into the enemy demoman stickies. “DOMINATED”
09:15 Probably the only useful thing he does so far, killing the med and scout.

Hmmmmm what the fuck was that?  It was awful.  Hey, it might get better after the first 10 minutes, but if that’s one of the best roamers in NA (therefore, probably the world) then that’s hilarious. Yet the video had lots of likes and views and seemed well received? I am confused.  Am I wrong?  Does PREM automatically mean you are good?  Nah, Darn disproves this already.